Finals and Computers

So my computer stopped working. 

I have decided that in today's society we rely quite heavily upon technology. When my computer broke, I was fine until I realized that all of my notes and all of my practice things for studying is on my computer. It is already extremely hard to concentrate because I will be getting married in two weeks now and I am close to saying "whatever" to it all. 

Back to society on technology. Today's world has made such advances in technology that it is incredible. Sadly, I feel like now that is overbearing in many ways. Take looking and applying for jobs. You have to update and maintain multiple social media avenues because that is where people look nowadays. You have Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter etc. Although these can be very useful in a sense, it is also overbearing. 

At school teachers are converting to E-Textbooks where it can be more cost effective and convenient but, in my case, when a computer crashes you are kind of left on your own. 

I think that my MCOM class really showed me how much social media is becoming more and more used on all avenues and I am not sure if that is a great thing. It takes quite a lot of time to constantly be updating and tweeting and such. Personally, I think it is silly but now if you aren't on a computer of have internet on your phone you fall behind and are uninformed about the going ons of the world. 

Tis quite the predicament. 

Family

Well, I should be studying for finals but instead I am thinking about my family. 

I think I have all the right to do so because I see them in 11 days :) 

My family has its conflicts but when I have needed someone in my life it has been them. I love that each person in my family has such a unique personality and because of that personality we have all been able to grow and love each other and learn to love and accept those around us. 

DJ: 

My big sister is beautiful. Actually she is stunningly gorgeous. She is strong spirited and won't take crude from anyone. Even when we were little she was always there to stick up for me when someone would try to cut me down. We have had our differences no doubt. In fact, all throughout high school we fought like cats and dogs, but I still loved her and I knew she loved me. Now we are a lot closer and I am so appreciative of the example she has set for me of the love that someone can have for others and the willingness to forgive and apply the Atonement in all aspects of my life. Now she is a beautiful mother and wife and still holds strong to not taking crude from anyone and standing up for what is right. 

David: 

Baby Davie, as we used to call him. :) He has always been so sweet and loving yet driven and competitive. Today he left me a note at work that lifted my spirits when I was feeling down and made me smile. Even when he was little he would try and put a smile on people's faces and make them laugh. but don't let his big heart fool you. He is a driven kid. He sets goals for himself and he accomplishes them. I have always been impressed with the example he has set for me his big sis and for everyone else in my family about the power of goal setting. He is a talented boy and will get far in life. I can't wait for him to go and serve the people in Rome and for them to love my brother for all the wonderful things he represents. 

Sariah: 

Oh were to start.... Sariah has always been a ray of sunshine in my life. She is the baby of the family. She is super creative and extremely witty. People who meet her at first haven't a clue of the beautiful and smart and hilarious person she is. I have never had a dull moment with my little sister. We have had lots of adventures of rolling down hills, planning extravagant "summer lists" and crying together and learning together. I would not change anything about Sariah. She has an uncanny way of befriending people that sometimes others dont realize need a friend. I know she has become one of the better friends I have and her beautiful spirit and her gorgeousness make people feel happy and special around her. I love her and her creative mind that allows her to create things that people love and enjoy. She is also very talented in sports and music and I am so proud of all she has accomplished and all she will accomplish in life. 

Parentals: 

My parents have been the foundation for my direction in life in so many ways. They have taught me how to be smart and how to be independent yet mindful of others. They have and are doing so much for me that I hope that I can keep making them proud. Whenever I have needed a listening ear or some help in any way they have been there. I am so grateful that they have taught me the importance of the gospel in my life and the power that comes from the priesthood and from raising a family in the Gospel. I am grateful for the example they have given me of loving everyone regardless of their background. I remember going to the store and my mom would talk to the workers and talk to them about life and you could see the love she had for them even though she didn't know them. My dad has always been one to give service and do hard work and I am grateful for the example of love he has given me through that. I love my parents very much and am grateful for everything they are doing for my upcoming wedding. 

My New Family: 

I can't forget my upcoming new family. First off they are a gorgeous bunch of people. I am so grateful that they are all so loving and have been so accepting of me. I am excited to keep learning about each of them and becoming a part of the family. I have already learned lessons of love and service from them and of acceptance and growing. Even if they don't know it, each one of them has already impacted my life in one way or another and I am grateful that I already feel connected to them. 

Family is so important to me and I am so grateful for each person that is a part of my family and I can't wait to start my own with my best friend Preston. He has become so essential in my life and I am so grateful for the example he is to me and the love that he shows me. I am so grateful that he is my friend and my love. 

I love all of my family and I am grateful for the Plan of Salvation that seals us together for eternity. I can't wait for May 4th and the opportunity it brings for me to have that blessing with Preston. :) 

Service and Mothers

Brother Clarke asked us to do another assignment: Do something nice for someone who is more stressed than you are and then write about it? 

Well... I have been pretty stressed. When he said this, I thought to myself, "No one could be more stressed than I am right now." Then things kind of were shook up for me. 

My first thought was my mom. My mom has a lot on her plate right now. she described it to me like this: 

"My plate is full. Sharon and Preston are the main dish and all the flavor and wonderfulness that comes with planning a wedding and gaining a new child are great. DJ and Josh are my worrisome portion that I am not sure will turn out as good as I expected. David is my greens and all the nutrients and help that having a son preparing to go on a mission brings. And Sariah, Sariah is my dessert because she bring happiness into my life at a time when I need it most." 

Background. I am getting married in 18 days!!! This is exciting and wonderful but I am not doing any of the planning meaning that my mom has been in charge of most if not all of it. My sister DJ has been having some struggles in her own little beautiful family but things seem to be getting better. David, my little brother is preparing to to on a mission to Rome, Italy in the next couple of months and so that has been on my mom's mind. And finally, Sariah. She is the last one at home and brings happiness to my mom when she needs it most. 

So anyways, I decided I would call my mom and see how she was doing. Something small right? Well I found out that she was having a hard day and that my call helped her out substantially. I can't imagine how hard it must be to be the matriarch of a family and still be composed in all aspects. It is incredible. 

I honestly think this assignment helped me more because it helped me gain a new appreciation for everything my mom has done in my life. She has been there for me when I needed her whether it was a bruised knee to a broken heart. I love her and her dedication to the Lord and the example that is in my life. I hope that someday I can turn out to be half the women that she is. 

Feedback

I have been trying to figure out what to write about for this last week and I haven't gotten any awe inspiring revelations. I finally realized that feedback is usually so important in our lives. we rely so much on the feedback people give to us that it is almost as thought we become incapable of doing anything else. For example, in my business writing class, we have gotten feedback on two assignments and it is the last official week of school. 

I will admit, because I haven't received any feedback, I am one who will not try my best the next time around. As a result I am pretty sure my results have gotten worse and worse. This got me thinking to what other feedback we expect in or lives. Even something as simple as reading a book, we expect feedback. 

Feedback comes in so many ways. It could be through advice, blunt remarks, knowledge obtained behind a book' feedback is everywhere. I feel like when people realize their true potential they recognize the feedback and use it constructively. Feedback is important but we should be able to learn to function with out it to the smallest degree. 

Spotlight

I hate being in the spotlight. I refrain from cameras and pointed questions, anything that makes me feel like I am the sole focus. That being said, this weekend was my bridal shower. No matter how hard you try, the bride (me) is the spotlight. 

I actually enjoyed myself. I stopped focusing so much on the fact that I was the spotlight and focused more on the fact that the people that came were people who loved me. I am so grateful for all the help that my family has been giving me with the wedding planning. We are now in the final month and I know that things are starting to get crazy. I am grateful that despite all that is going on their lives they have made me a priority because they love me. 

It is an awesome feeling being loved. I love that my family loves me, my future Wilcken and that Preston loves me. Oh my, coming back to Utah was fun knowing that he was here waiting for me I am so grateful for all that he is in my life and I can't wait for the next month to fly by. I am grateful for the chance to be sealed to a wonderful man for time and all eternity. :) 

"And Down She Goes"

This past week has been an interesting one. There are so many things going on that it sometimes makes for a little craziness. To top it off I fainted on Friday. It was really weird. 

I started the day by donating plasma. It was my third time and so I figured why not. After I donated, I usually will eat and go to work and at work I usually simply will sit down. Friday was a little different. I didn't get to eat much after donating and work was crazy. I was walking a lot and making sure things were as they were supposed. to. Part of work on Friday was making sure that the Education in Zion tour went by smoothly and be a participant. I rushed over there and as they started I leaned against the railing. 

I locked my legs... Worst possible mistake ever. I remember that I felt a head rush that happens sometimes when I stand up too quickly. Anyways, the next thing I remember is coming to and wondering why there were people around me and why I wasn't in my room (I felt like I was sleeping). One guy thought that I had died because apparently when I fainted my eyes were still open. I of course saw nothing though. 

I am so grateful that one of my friends was there and was able to help me get re-situated. I am also grateful that everyone that was there was super friendly and so willing to help. I am also grateful that my boss had decided to go home early and so she was able to drive me home. 

I have now been forbidden to donate plasma by my wonderful fiance, Preston. I am grateful that he is always so concerned about me and has my best interest in mind. I love him so much. I am hoping that the stress of the end of the semester along with all the changes that will be occurring doesn't induce any more fainting spells. I hope that this was simply a one time thing. 

Doing Something Nice

As part of an assignment for my business writing class we were prompted to "buy a Coke" for someone and write about their reaction to it. 

I ended up buying Mucho Mango and gas.

 My fiance drives down every weekend from Salt Lake to come see me. He usually ends up driving back really late and stops at a gas station to buy Mucho Mango, one of his favorite drinks to keep him awake. Well, this past weekend I surprised him by having 4-5 of these drinks in my fridge for him to grab when he leaves. The expression on his face was pretty great and I got a pretty wonderful reward too. Not only did I feel all nice and fuzzy inside, I also got a nice big kiss (well really a few kisses). 

Then I bought his gas. He was running really low and he needed to fill up and so I said that I would pay for it since he always paid for it. He asked if I was sure and I grinned and said that of course of I would. He was extremely grateful for it and again I felt all nice and fuzzy and I got a few kisses. I think this project was great in that it helped me think of ways to help someone that has always been so great in my life. It also made me realize that it isn't that hard to be kind to the people around me. 

Weekends

Let me preface this post with the fact that being engaged stinks. Not the fact that I'm getting married, because I am so excited for that part. More along the lines that it is dumb waiting for something that is going to be so great! It' even worse because the weeks drag so slowly and then the weekends fly by (I only see Preston on the weekends). Only seven weeks left!!

This is like life. Sometimes our hard times (the weekdays) seem to drag on and on and the good times (the weekends) seem to fly by. I think I need to start enjoying the weeks so I can more fully appreciate my weekends. Just some food for thought! 

New Chapters

Growing up is an interesting concept. Oftentimes you don't realize how far you've gone until brief moments that in essence "wake you up" and make you realize that you have accomplished (or have not accomplished) a lot up to that point. 

I've had a few waking up moments the past few days. Preston and I went and took engagement pictures which made me realize how quickly our wedding is coming up. 

We will be signing a contract tomorrow for an apartment that we found to live in. It is exciting to know that we will be living together and all that entails. Sometimes I look back and am surprised by how much has already happened and how fast things go by. 

I think my biggest eye-opener this past week was my internship interview with the church. It was weird to think that I will be doing more interviews in the years to come once I graduate from school. 

My grandpa told me that once you graduate high school time flies and before you know it you have grand-kids and great-grand-kids. I think I have started to realize how fast time really does fly and I hope that I can accomplish something significant to the people around me before my time is up. 

Gratitude

New beginnings can be exciting but they can also be stressful. Last night Preston and I found a place that we will be calling home for our time here in Utah. It was a relief to get another thing off our checklist. I am so grateful that we have an opportunity to be guided by the spirit and have good communication skills with each other. If we were not led by the Spirit we would have had a lot of anxiety about choosing a place to rent, but because we both know where our priorities lie we were able to pray and feel good about our decision. 

I am so grateful that God is so willing to guide me in the decisions in my life that are important to me. Because they are important to me, they become important to him and for that I am grateful. He knows when I need more than just a pat on the back to get me going or a jerk in the right direction. I am also grateful that He is always there, even if I feel like I'm doing things on my own. I have learned that I am not. 

I am so grateful that He has a purpose for me and guides me throughout my day-to-day activities. I am so grateful that I am marrying someone that understands the importance of the gospel. I am so grateful that Preston recognizes that our love for each other grows when our love for our Heavenly Father grows too. I am so grateful that Preston loves me, treats me kindly, and reveres me. It is a wonderful feeling loving someone, and I am grateful that I am able to feel that with Preston. 

Dr. Seuss

I know the Christmas season is done, but in Utah, specifically Provo and Salt Lake, the weather has decided otherwise. Today we are expecting a big snow storm. I finished an interview for an internship and when I walked outside the storm had begun.

It is times like this weekend where I wish that I was in good ol' AZ. On the plus side, I am in Salt Lake City which means that I get to be with my fiance. We are planning on making the most of the weather. :) 

On that note. I am so grateful for the fact that Preston is in my life. I never thought I'd find that "prince charming" that everyone talks about. I have never met anyone with so much love and respect in his life. I am so grateful for the way he loves and treats his family and me. I love him so much and can't wait to be with my best friend for time and all eternity. He has so much patience for me and is so willing to accept me and all my flaws. I love that he is such a gentle man and I am grateful that we will have been dating for a year before we get sealed. I never thought my dreams would come true but as cliche as it sounds, they have. 

The following Dr. Seuss quotes capture what I am feeling perfectly: 

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than you dreams" 

"We are all a little weird and life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love."

Finally, another quote I found that I am going to paraphrase a little that describes Preston in my life: 

"Twenty years from now, I am gonna look back with gratitude because I know that you are that one person who can turn every frown into a smile in a few simple words; that person who lifts my head when I am struggling; that person who carries tears on his shoulders; that person that accepts me, that person that knows who I really am and that person that has mad the biggest difference in my life..my best friend" 

I am so grateful that I can truly say that I love Preston! He is the best and everyday I love him more and more. It is awesome :) 

First Timers...

So, I've been thinking as of late of first times. We have first times to do things all the time. They can be exciting and nerve-wracking and a plethora of other emotions. The first time you ride a bike. The first time you go to school. The first time you take a test. etc. 

Today was my first time going sledding in my adult years. Boy was it fun! 

I really don't have much to say but that it is nice to relish the first time things happen. When you do, you can look back on it with satisfaction. 

"O be wise; what can I say more?"

In one of my Sunday school classes we talked about the different ways of learning and that has caused me to think about the differences of knowledge and wisdom.

First off, the definitions of the two are similar but different. So here are the good ol' Merriam Webster versions of the two. 

Knowledge:

a (1) : the fact or condition of knowing something with familiarity gained through experience or association (2) :acquaintance with or understanding of a science, art, or technique

b (1) : the fact or condition of being aware of something (2) :the range of one's information or understanding

c : the circumstance or condition of apprehending truth or fact through reasoning

d : the fact or condition of having information or of being learned

Wisdom:

a : accumulated philosophic or scientific learningb : ability to discern inner qualities and relationshipsc : good sense d : generally accepted belief 

a wise attitude, belief, or course of action; the teachings of the ancient wise men

Wikipedia has a definition of wisdom that ties more into what I think I'm trying to get across. Wisdom is the judicious application of knowledge. It is a deep understanding and realization of people, things, events or situations, resulting in the ability to apply perceptions, judgments and actions in keeping with this understanding.

For me this means that you can have all the knowledge in the world, but until you apply that knowledge in different circumstances you won't gain anything. It's like the scriptures say when they talk about the "learned think they are wise." Anyone can be wise if they apply what they learn and grow from that. 

Just some food for thought.  

T....I....M....E

Well, one of my professors is requiring blog posting and tweeting again. It's the only reason I ever started one to be perfectly honest, but here it goes. 

It is crazy to think that just two weeks ago I got engaged to my best friend!! :) The only problem is that Preston lives in Salt Lake and I live in Provo and we both have crazy schedules. It seems like time is going so slowly because I keep forgetting that today is only the third day back to classes and I want it to be the weekend. 

This got me thinking about time. Time is a form of measurement and yet it never seems to follow any set rule. When you are having fun and "time flies" or when you have to wait in line and time seems to never progress. 

Yet, we depend on time. We set up meetings, vacations, work schedules, school schedules, play 

dates, etc., all based on our dependency of time and the trust we have that those we schedule with will follow the timeline. We can be early or late or on-time by seconds, minutes, hours. It is incredible to realize that some small matter of time could make the difference in everything and we can overlook those moments without even realizing it. 

For me, time can become a spiritual matter. God references time in the scriptures whether it's in the Bible or Book of Mormon and it is just as important then to people as it is now. Time in a way is an infinite thing which is why, with my finite mind, I sometimes can't comprehend it. One thing I have learned over and over (and imagine I will keep learning over and over), is that God's time-table is very different than mine. Based from my decisions, the times for events or blessings or guidance to happen could be longer or shorter than I had expected.  

Lately I have been looking back on the Lord's timing in my life and I am so grateful that the way he works things is perfect. He knows what timing is best for me and for that I am where I'm at now. Granted, even though there are moments when I can get frustrated with time, I am still grateful it is there. Without it, life would be difficult to coordinate and record. 

I need to not forget to appreciate time even when it is going slowly as I wait for the weekend! Time is so precious and can't be returned or renewed. It is important to make time count while you have it. :)